My Way or Thy Way

I left the house shortly after 6:30 a.m. and quickly entered the address of my destination on my GPS. While I had been to this location once before, I still didn’t know how to get there and because I was running behind I needed the quickest route available. As I watched the directions upload I remembered the last time I made that trip.

Just three weeks prior I left for the same location, input the same address and off I went. But that time I thought I knew better. I decided I knew exactly where I was going and that my GPS must be wrong. Every time I made a turn that I wanted to make my GPS would start spinning and tell me, “Redirecting.” Each time I ignored the warning signals because I thought I knew better (even though I had no idea where my actual destination was). I still chose to ignore the routes and warnings. And while I still arrived at my destination – I was late.

I knew to trust the GPS this go around.

How many times does that happen to us? The Lord whispers, “send a card,” but you ignore it and days later you hear she had a miscarriage. Or how many times has the Lord prompted you to stop somewhere for a reason unknown and you ignore it because surely God wouldn’t tell me to do that –

How many times have I chosen my own desires over the Lord’s desires for my life.

I’m guilty. And of so much more –

The scriptures tell us that God has a plan and purpose for our lives. A perfect plan. I know there are purposes for my life that He has whispered to me, but because I chose to ignore certain routes and made my own turns, I have delayed those purposes. Some of His plans took me down some hard roads that I didn’t like, but those hard roads have taught me so much more than had I taken the easy way. I’m more thankful for those hard roads now. In hindsight those pot holes and detours allowed me to see certain character flaws that He has tweaked during those travels. All those u-turns and heels I put in the ground only delayed the inevitable.

This morning a doctor gave me a diagnosis. He said not all the labs support it – yet – but enough of them do to continue testing. He believes I am in a Pre Sjögren syndrome phase. I have more labs to do and follow up in three months. Because I am so sensitive to so many medications we are not adding medications at this time, only tweaking the few I do take. While I was disappointed the labs didn’t give a definitive answer today, I am so thankful to have a doctor that listened. That didn’t make me feel stupid. That didn’t blame it on my weight. That answered questions and was sincere. It took two years to get here.

Imagine had I gone to a doctor I had chosen instead of waiting for God’s perfect one for me. He doesn’t have to be the perfect doctor for you – but he is the one the Lord provided for me – and I’m thankful.

Proverbs 16:9, “The mind of man plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.

Oh Father, thank you for the direction you give me in my day to day life. Forgive me for trying to take the reigns. Thank you for sending me the doctor you wanted me to have. Guide him through the process. Lord you made me and my body. You know exactly what is going on. Reveal it to the doctor you have placed over me. Give me courage to do what he has prescribed me to do, and grace for me I fail. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for saving me. Now go before me, this I pray in the most powerful name – the name above all names – Jesus. Amen.

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