I don’t read a lot. I never have cared to read. I have struggled with comprehension my entire life. My vocabulary is limited. I am constantly having to ask what something means and when someone is trying to explain something that I don’t understand, if I can’t get a visual image of it in my mind then I’m just lost. With that said, occasionally the Lord impresses it on people’s heart to send me books. They have come during a specific season and have been used to grow and nurture a hurting heart and for a specific time, such as this.
I awoke this morning at 3:40 a.m. and couldn’t go back to sleep. My heart is heavy for my son.
I am scared for him.
After fighting sleep and trying to pray my worries back to the Lord, I decided to check on my boy and read my Bible. As I entered his room, I sensed the Holy Spirit telling me to pray. So I did just that. As I ran my fingertips along every wall in his room and the door frames, the window frame, the blinds, the radio, the legos tables and legos, the curtains, the bed, and even pillows . . . I then placed my hand over my boy’s forehead and continued to pray. As I said, “Amen” I heard him say, “I thought you were talking, I didn’t know you were praying.”
He was so gentle in that moment.
I picked up my Bible, not even sure where to go this morning . . . But I know that I know that I know that in the scriptures are directions for life, but as I reached for my Bible my eyes were diverted. A book . . . I didn’t even remember getting until I opened it . . . caught my attention.
I thought how strange it was that suddenly I am drawn in after all these months, I couldn’t read the dedication without crying. It’s like it was written for me and in that exact moment . . . words so simple, yet so profound.
As I read the words on the cover Toby Mac’s song, “Move” (Keep walkin”) came to mind, so I thought I would share it. I wish I knew how to download it so I could make it the ringtone on my phone. Wouldn’t it be incredible to wake up to this as an alarm?! It reminds me of the word, “Persist.” Our Pastor tells us regularly, “persist, persist, persist!”
Don’t give up.
When we are at our weakest, He is at His strongest.
(I do want to add there are some things in the book that are not Biblically sound. It is very important to use discernment when reading any book. In this particular book the writer was an alcoholic and struggled with food addiction, so it is close and personal with my own past struggles. I’m not telling you to not read it, I’m just saying use discernment.)